Still reading, but I noticed that Jared asserts that men dislike feminism.
That's news to me, a woman who knows SEVERAL men who are staunchly feminist and who don't feel threatened by feminism at all. Maybe because they managed to tune out the patriarchy's noise enough to understand that "feminism" just means that women should be acknowledged and treated as exactly as human as men. 🤔
Except…I have had men say they were on the side of feminism, when in fact they were quite sexist and expected the women in their lives (or the women they aspired to have in their lives) to fulfill traditional roles. Many men do not know what the hell they want, beyond the household equivalent of having the metaphorical trains run on time.
As a guy, this isn't an unfair assessment. I'm better than I was when I was younger, but I still sometimes find myself falling into gendered assumptions and expectations. Thankfully, I'm generally more aware of my thinking now, so those assumptions don't take root and become the default.
It's quaint how men like Jare never acknowledge that every single man has the option of not using their penis to impregnate someone, which is a 100% reliable way not to ever have to worry about child support OR abortion. :)
Maybe we need to establish a stereotype of the manbaby who has mantrums, is testerical and is constantly seeking himpathy.
I was very interested in your explanation of how “girls mature faster” is weaponised to make us absorb everyone else’s bad behaviour (I am not just talking about men here, I used to tread on eggshells round my Mother and learned at a young age how to read her moods. She left my Dad because he wasn’t “exciting” enough. Mind you, best thing she did for him, because he met and married a wonderful woman and they were married for over 40 years before he died last year).
Anyway, I saw something on Pinterest this morning which seems appropriate here:
“Dysfunctional family systems don’t get mad at the abuse. They get mad at the person brave enough to call it out. And that is the dysfunction working as intended”.
I love your work, thank you. And I still read anti-feminist accounts with my jaw on the floor wondering what world they are living in.
Fully agree with your interpretation of "girls mature faster" as placing addl responsibility on girls. It was part of teaching me how to manage my response to boys' behavior to achieve the best possible outcome, bc they "can't" manage their behavior themselves.
Which obvs extends into adulthood when we are expected to make sure we don't "cause" a man to treat us badly. Pernicious from many angles!
About three years after after my divorce, and less than one year after my mom's death, I had lunch with my mom's sisters + my great aunt from Italy. Everyone but my great aunt was asking me why I wasn't dating, why didn't I have a man. I turned to my great aunt, who was a widow, and asked her why she never remarried (her husband died when she was in her late 30s, leaving her with 4 children to raise on her own). She said, "Do you think I wanted to wash another man's underpants ever again?!" Translation: She was done. She raised her kids and is living a very full life. I turned to my other aunts and said, "If staying single for the rest of her life is good enough for her it's good enough for me." I have no regrets.
Wow. Jared would have loved my dad and approved of his 54 year marriage to my mom. They were til death do us part, and my dad would have agreed with every one of his points, right down to "I'm a good man!Ask any of these random people I have impressed by my tales of being a good guy!"
My mom, for pretty much every word Professor Meredith wrote here, resented the everloving fucking hell out of him, all day every day, and was quite relieved when he passed a couple of years ago. Unfortunately that much pent up resentment and anger has done a number on her health so she cannot enjoy her freedom as much as she would like.
Me? After watching their marriage vowed by age ten to never marry. I didn't need feminism for that, just the vision of marriage Jared endorses playing out every day in my jouse!
I share a similar experience of having watched my parents’ relationship in action (even though in my case, eventually my mother extricated herself, at great personal peril–but such a moment of clarity and relief for me to see that what I saw was not a mirage). It feels like a variation of “the problem that has no name.” It is startlingly valuable to hear something like this personal history. Thank you. I feel like many little veils of sadness and awareness continue to be lifted.
It never ceases to amaze me that these cucks have zero problem identifying all black/brown man are "inherently bad/ gangsters" etc. but when it comes to white men, then we have to treat them all nice and kind because only a "few are bad guys". Well excuse me chad, its not like you walk around with a rating system thats blinks neon over your head that would allow me to have that info up front. Lastly, men are feeling the heat from women more because a lot of us decided to take the kid gloves off and treat them like adults. Directly calling our their bs, outright telling them no when they try and have bad faith arguments, etc. I feel bad for next gal who gets trapped with him. 😕
Jared sounds like he was or is currently a youth pastor. I hope his ex-wife is out there learning the reality about feminism and enjoying what I suspect may be her first orgasm.
I can't wait for men like Jared to be able to own/marry sexbots. That's really what he wants: a mindless slave who will never reject him. Give it to him! He'll still be unhappy.
Still reading, but I noticed that Jared asserts that men dislike feminism.
That's news to me, a woman who knows SEVERAL men who are staunchly feminist and who don't feel threatened by feminism at all. Maybe because they managed to tune out the patriarchy's noise enough to understand that "feminism" just means that women should be acknowledged and treated as exactly as human as men. 🤔
Except…I have had men say they were on the side of feminism, when in fact they were quite sexist and expected the women in their lives (or the women they aspired to have in their lives) to fulfill traditional roles. Many men do not know what the hell they want, beyond the household equivalent of having the metaphorical trains run on time.
As a guy, this isn't an unfair assessment. I'm better than I was when I was younger, but I still sometimes find myself falling into gendered assumptions and expectations. Thankfully, I'm generally more aware of my thinking now, so those assumptions don't take root and become the default.
I love how everyone but Jared knows why Jared is divorced. Self awareness of a rock
That part😂
That feels unfair to rocks
Thank you. So many parts of this were just spot on.
Ok, you got me. I have to read this article because the image of this douchenozzle’s tweet is sending me.
It's quaint how men like Jare never acknowledge that every single man has the option of not using their penis to impregnate someone, which is a 100% reliable way not to ever have to worry about child support OR abortion. :)
Maybe we need to establish a stereotype of the manbaby who has mantrums, is testerical and is constantly seeking himpathy.
I was very interested in your explanation of how “girls mature faster” is weaponised to make us absorb everyone else’s bad behaviour (I am not just talking about men here, I used to tread on eggshells round my Mother and learned at a young age how to read her moods. She left my Dad because he wasn’t “exciting” enough. Mind you, best thing she did for him, because he met and married a wonderful woman and they were married for over 40 years before he died last year).
Anyway, I saw something on Pinterest this morning which seems appropriate here:
“Dysfunctional family systems don’t get mad at the abuse. They get mad at the person brave enough to call it out. And that is the dysfunction working as intended”.
I love your work, thank you. And I still read anti-feminist accounts with my jaw on the floor wondering what world they are living in.
Oh look. A man mansplaining women’s choices.
Go away. She’s your x for a reason.
Fully agree with your interpretation of "girls mature faster" as placing addl responsibility on girls. It was part of teaching me how to manage my response to boys' behavior to achieve the best possible outcome, bc they "can't" manage their behavior themselves.
Which obvs extends into adulthood when we are expected to make sure we don't "cause" a man to treat us badly. Pernicious from many angles!
If he really knew her they wouldn't be divorced.
This is such a great piece. I love your work!
About three years after after my divorce, and less than one year after my mom's death, I had lunch with my mom's sisters + my great aunt from Italy. Everyone but my great aunt was asking me why I wasn't dating, why didn't I have a man. I turned to my great aunt, who was a widow, and asked her why she never remarried (her husband died when she was in her late 30s, leaving her with 4 children to raise on her own). She said, "Do you think I wanted to wash another man's underpants ever again?!" Translation: She was done. She raised her kids and is living a very full life. I turned to my other aunts and said, "If staying single for the rest of her life is good enough for her it's good enough for me." I have no regrets.
I think you would enjoy this film:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt10692578/
Wow. Jared would have loved my dad and approved of his 54 year marriage to my mom. They were til death do us part, and my dad would have agreed with every one of his points, right down to "I'm a good man!Ask any of these random people I have impressed by my tales of being a good guy!"
My mom, for pretty much every word Professor Meredith wrote here, resented the everloving fucking hell out of him, all day every day, and was quite relieved when he passed a couple of years ago. Unfortunately that much pent up resentment and anger has done a number on her health so she cannot enjoy her freedom as much as she would like.
Me? After watching their marriage vowed by age ten to never marry. I didn't need feminism for that, just the vision of marriage Jared endorses playing out every day in my jouse!
I share a similar experience of having watched my parents’ relationship in action (even though in my case, eventually my mother extricated herself, at great personal peril–but such a moment of clarity and relief for me to see that what I saw was not a mirage). It feels like a variation of “the problem that has no name.” It is startlingly valuable to hear something like this personal history. Thank you. I feel like many little veils of sadness and awareness continue to be lifted.
It never ceases to amaze me that these cucks have zero problem identifying all black/brown man are "inherently bad/ gangsters" etc. but when it comes to white men, then we have to treat them all nice and kind because only a "few are bad guys". Well excuse me chad, its not like you walk around with a rating system thats blinks neon over your head that would allow me to have that info up front. Lastly, men are feeling the heat from women more because a lot of us decided to take the kid gloves off and treat them like adults. Directly calling our their bs, outright telling them no when they try and have bad faith arguments, etc. I feel bad for next gal who gets trapped with him. 😕
Jared sounds like he was or is currently a youth pastor. I hope his ex-wife is out there learning the reality about feminism and enjoying what I suspect may be her first orgasm.
I can't wait for men like Jared to be able to own/marry sexbots. That's really what he wants: a mindless slave who will never reject him. Give it to him! He'll still be unhappy.
Jared is a bitter divorced man. They are a dime a dozen. Why give him any air time?
His statement that he knows his ex wife better than she knows herself sums up that marriage! I hope his ex is enjoying her freedom.
Mansplaining feminism is peak mansplaining